One of the things I've discovered about myself over the last few years is that I do seem to have a knack for being happy. My instinct is to say that this wasn't always the case -- that it's a learned behavior more than something innate? But when I think about it, I'm not actually sure that's true. There have definitely been extended times when I was desperately unhappy about specific things, and other extended times when I was depressed. But looking back, even if it didn't feel that way at the time, I think I've maybe always been fairly good at finding ways to stay more or less okay with myself, no matter what, and definitely been good at recognizing the bright spots and gifts and opportunities when and as they came along.
Which doesn't necessarily mean that it wasn't learned. And I absolutely believe that wherever it started, I've had to learn how to maximize the good it does me and dodge the potential downsides. It's just that when I think about the stuff that's shaped me, I'm really struck me how easily a lot of it could have shaped me in some direction other than this particular one. But who knows. Here I am, in any case, and so far, so good, although definitely college was better than high school and every year after college has been (in terms of overall trajectory, if not every last moment -- the worst stretches of my life have come since college, it's just that the k-12 years were much higher in terms of overall pointless misery) better than the year before.
Which does tend to help one keep one's optimism up!
(The bit about kids not making a significant difference either way does surprise me. Not from personal experience, seeing as I have none, but that's not what I've heard previously/elsewhere.)
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Which doesn't necessarily mean that it wasn't learned. And I absolutely believe that wherever it started, I've had to learn how to maximize the good it does me and dodge the potential downsides. It's just that when I think about the stuff that's shaped me, I'm really struck me how easily a lot of it could have shaped me in some direction other than this particular one. But who knows. Here I am, in any case, and so far, so good, although definitely college was better than high school and every year after college has been (in terms of overall trajectory, if not every last moment -- the worst stretches of my life have come since college, it's just that the k-12 years were much higher in terms of overall pointless misery) better than the year before.
Which does tend to help one keep one's optimism up!
(The bit about kids not making a significant difference either way does surprise me. Not from personal experience, seeing as I have none, but that's not what I've heard previously/elsewhere.)